It didn't feel like home.
I was not excited anymore about anything. I felt alienated all of a sudden.
Was not happy. But also wasn't sad. Was ok. Felt like I'm going because I have to go.
It felt weird.

I felt so down, so in need to cry my eyes out.

I didn't feel like I belong to this place. And I don't belong there either. I belong to the space inbetween. I belong to the concepts of packing, moving and waiting.

I was filled with unexplainable fury. I was filled with uncomfort and silence. I had nothing to say. Actually, I had a lot to say, but I couldn't talk. I didn't want to talk. I wanted to be alone. I still feel like being alone.

I cried my eyes out. I cried till I fell asleep. I needed to let out the pressure. I was frustrated and disappointed. I am still frustrated.

I feel lonely. I feel unsettled. I am tired. I am selfish. I am a bad mother.